The truth about Henry McLean Part 1

Disclaimer: This is NOT an attempt to bring glory to me or to stir up your emotions. This is solely for the Glory of Jesus Christ, the Son and God the Father. ALL Accounts are true, and while this was hard for me to do...I must do it because it will bring souls to Christ. THIS IS MY TESTIMONY


"And they have overcome (conquered ) him by means of the blood of the Lamb and by the utterance of their testimony, for they did not love and cling to life even when faced with death [holding their lives cheap till they had to die for their witnessing]." -Revelation 12:11


Hi, my name is Henry Louis McLean, and this is my testimony. Many people look at me, and read my statuses and tweets and think that I may have been saved since birth. However, this is NOT the case but as the famous quote says, "Every saint has a past and every sinner a future."

My life has always led to me question God. Since I can remember, I have always demanded answers from God about why he allowed my life to be like it is. It started when I was a baby, I was born premature, and you could hold me in the palm of your hand (literally). Then, I lost my right leg due to lack of blood circulation. As I grew older, I didnt care about having a fake leg, actually I used it to get girls (crazy right?) but when I hit middle school, that's when everything changed.

I had been baptized as a kid, and I witnessed to my best friend in lunch, I explained baptism, God, and a whole bunch of other stuff (and I was only 10). So I had some knowledge about God and while I didnt know what holiness was, I knew the difference between right and wrong. During this time, I didnt care that I had a fake leg, my thoughts were "God you made me this way and I accept it" and I did but around the time I got to middle school, I had fallen away from God, I had become like the prodigal son but my awareness also kicked in, and I realized that I had a fake leg, and was the ONLY kid in my whole grade that had 1 and then, my feeling changed from happiness to depression.

I became jealous of other people, because I had always wondered what life would be like for me if I had 2 "normal" legs, made of flesh instead of just 1. It angered me that my friends could just go swimming and that I had 2 take my leg off before I could swim, and that attracted unwanted attention and made me  feel even more insecure about my "disability". Then, it only got worse when I wanted to wear shorts and 1 leg was darker than the other and people began to question on me on why it was like that and just like swimming, it brought unwanted attention and I began to hate myself for being this way and God for making me this way. I had allowed satan to influence me into thinking that God didnt want the best for me, and that I was better off alone.

I began to question God, and cry because I hated the way I was created. I hated that I had a fake leg, and that it took me 16 years to ride a bike when others learned at 5, and so I developed a love-hate relationship with God, I loved him only because I didnt wanna go to Hell (figures right?) but hated him for creating me this way. As the years passed, I stopped swimming, and I stopped wearing shorts to cover up my "flaw", my "disability". I not only began to hate myself but I hated those that had what I desperately wanted: 2 legs made of skin and bone. Now while I have all this hatred inside of me, I didnt show it. I knew that if I did, I'd attract attention and people would think I'm wierd so I just played it cool but inside I was dying.

My friends began to decrease because I didnt wanna keep answering questions like "why do you walk like that?" or "what's wrong with your leg?" Even in gym, people would stare and all I could think was "God, tell me why the &^&* did you make me this way?" and yes I did curse back then and I was angry, and when my mom left...I began to wonder if the fact that I had a fake leg was the reason why she had left. This caused me to slip into a depression that would not be lifted until 2011, and it caused me to rebel AGAINST God even though I knew I was wrong.

However, after years and years of questioning God, and hating Him for making me this way. God finally answered me, and told me why. I was 19 at the time, and I began to reflect over my life and all the hell I went through, and I wasnt saved at the time, and I said "God, why me?" and God replied, "why not you?" I was confused and angry. How dare the God of the Universe answer a question with a question?! But then God opened my eyes to see something. I was in ROTC in all 4 years of high school, and I had obtained the rank of Sergeant, scored over a 200 on my Physical Fitness Test (which is an elite score), and the people I had inspired. Even 3 years after graduation, people tell me that I inspired them to do their best, and it was humbling because I wasn't trying to inspire them in any way but then I realized God did that to show me that His Plan is always perfect, even when I'm not. People always say, "God won't put more on you than you can bear" but I think people use that as a cliche and miss the point of the quote, so let me explain.

God allowed my leg to take me to a point of depression, hate, and questions. Why? Because He knew that although I would be pushed to the edge, I would not jump off and die. During the years that I hated myself and God, I knew He had a reason for doing it and I knew that God always does what is right. He allowed me to see that if this burden had been placed on someone OTHER THAN ME, they would not have carried out His Plan, but probably would have committed suicide.

If you're someone struggling to accept how you are, know that God loves you and he created you and saw that you were good. God doesn't hate you, He loves you more than you could ever know. If you hate yourself, just know that the burden your carrying may be heavy but it wont break you. Yes, it hurts  and no, you dont understand but trust me when I say that it is all for God's Glory, and to show you who you really are. I could have chosen to give up on myself because of my leg but I didnt, and it lead others to be inspired. When your depressed and you ask God "why did you create me this way?" His answer is found in His Word, and it reads:

"and I praise you because of the wonderful way you created me. Everything you do is marvelous! Of this I have no doubt." -Psalms 139:14


GOD CREATED YOU WITH LOVE AND CARE, HE LOVES YOU MORE THAN YOU'LL EVER KNOW